{happiness challenge} know and do

Monday, September 23, 2013


I have to be honest, this week's challenge about honesty didn't really pique my interest at first. But then I thought about this week and what lies ahead.

My fabulous Boss Lady, whom I've worked with for the past five and a half years and who started our division of the company about seven years ago, is leaving our company to stay home with her kiddos. Being the gal who's been with the division the longest besides Boss Lady, I volunteered to work a little more and to go into the office a couple of days a week to help smooth the gap.

It shouldn't be too bad. Baby Girl loves to play with her cousins at my sister's, who will be watching her. It will only be temporary until they hire a new director and get him or her up to speed. I even started to feel a little nostalgia when I'd go into the office for a meeting and see my little cubicle without all my cute decorations and maybe, just maybe, kind of want to work there again, just a little bit.

But I also remember what it was like before I had my Girl. I worked full time and sat in that cube day in and day out. The office dynamics had really been a drain for me before we found out we were preggo, and after we got the news all I could do was dream about the day she would come. I dreamed about the days when I could set my own priorities, create my own environment, not hear all the Hollywood gossip day in and day out, and especially to only have one person to please; my BH who already loved me.

So I'm a little nervous about returning to the office on a regular basis. Even though it will be nice to be able to sit down and think about one thing for longer than five minutes before switching to a different task, it will be rough for me to be without my Dear Darling One for longer than we've usually gone. And in thinking about the happiness challenge this week I'm a bit nervous about going back to a situation where I have to fit other people's expectations of me. Socially I had learned what to hold back about myself and what to trumpet to produce the smoothest working relationships with others. I had no children and could easily love being married and working at the same time.

Now that I have a beautiful darling babe and I work part time around her schedule I am concerned about knowing and doing. My coworkers and new boss don't want to hear that my family, my husband and my child, come before them and before the work we do. They don't want to know that the reason I can't stay late and fix all the issues that they have is because I miss my Boo Bear and need her lovings. I am also worried about working from home supporting a new boss that I barely know and telling him/her that they'll have to wait until I put Boo Bear down for her nap before I can answer their question or complete their task.

But that is where my wonderful hubby and my ridiculous budget spreadsheet come in. We have planned out all the options if my working situation doesn't work for the new director and we have to figure something else out. I know that my family is most important to me and I work for their benefit. I strive to do everything I can to be a productive employee with the resources I have, but my job does not define me. I will do my best to reconcile my work and my home responsibilities, but I will always be what I am and not pretend otherwise.

So this week I will remember that my family is eternal and my job is temporary. What I know will dictate what I do, both in the little daily interactions and the big decisions and changes that come with this life.

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1 comments

  1. This is a great, personal application of this quote! I'm curious as to what you do? I'm day dreaming about being with my baby all day too. Probably adds to my pregnancy brain! I can't wait!

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